{"id":3576,"date":"2015-06-18T18:59:31","date_gmt":"2015-06-18T16:59:31","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/ozinzen.com\/blog\/?p=3576"},"modified":"2016-03-10T07:26:49","modified_gmt":"2016-03-10T06:26:49","slug":"la-brigade-de-repression-des-mannequins-trop-maigres","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/ozinzen.com\/blog\/la-brigade-de-repression-des-mannequins-trop-maigres\/","title":{"rendered":"La brigade de r\u00e9pression des mannequins trop maigres"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"mannequin<\/a><\/p>\n

Un article satirique <\/a>du magazine capital.fr<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Le 3 avril dernier, sur la proposition du d\u00e9put\u00e9 de l’Is\u00e8re Olivier V\u00e9ran, l’Assembl\u00e9e nationale a vot\u00e9 l’interdiction de d\u00e9filer pour tous les mannequins trop maigres. Ces jeunes filles n’auront pas non plus le droit de poser pour les magazines, y compris le n\u00f4tre, si bien que nous en croiserons moins souvent dans les couloirs, \u00e7a fera de la place (un peu).<\/span><\/p>\n

Tout \u00e0 fait entre nous, cette d\u00e9cision n’est pas pour nous d\u00e9plaire. Comme beaucoup d’obs\u00e9d\u00e9s sexuels, nous affectionnons plut\u00f4t les girondes, et la vue de ces ombres impalpables biberonn\u00e9es \u00e0 la feuille de salade nous a toujours donn\u00e9 des frissons. Le nouveau texte est donc bienvenu. Il pr\u00e9voit six mois d’emprisonnement et 75.000 euros d’amende en cas de d\u00e9filage hors des clous, cela devrait suffire \u00e0 dissuader les contrevenantes et les marlous qui les cornaquent. Reste, cependant, \u00e0 r\u00e9gler un d\u00e9tail technique: comment va-t-on faire appliquer cette loi?<\/span><\/p>\n

A l’heure o\u00f9 nous \u00e9crivons ces lignes, les pouvoirs publics n’ont encore fourni aucune pr\u00e9cision officielle \u00e0 ce sujet, mais l’on peut d\u00e9j\u00e0 annoncer qu’un corps de contr\u00f4leurs va \u00eatre cr\u00e9\u00e9 pour la circonstance au minist\u00e8re de l’Int\u00e9rieur. R\u00e9partis dans une quinzaine de BRMTM (brigades de r\u00e9pression des mannequins trop maigres) et plac\u00e9s sous les ordres du lieutenant-colonel Lienard, ces hommes sp\u00e9cialement form\u00e9s \u00e0 l’anatomie seront v\u00eatus de Levi’s slim fit, veste The Kooples et bonnet commandant Cousteau.<\/span><\/p>\n

Leur mission, s’ils l’acceptent, sera de s’immiscer discr\u00e8tement dans les shootings et de bondir sur leurs proies avant qu’elles aient le temps de s’enfuir en sous-v\u00eatements. Il leur suffira ensuite de prendre leurs mensurations cuisses-hanches-poitrine avec un m\u00e8tre de couturi\u00e8re, et de les faire coffrer en cas de d\u00e9passement des seuils autoris\u00e9s.<\/span><\/p>\n

Le recrutement de nouveaux fonctionnaires \u00e9tant exclu pour des raisons budg\u00e9taires, ces agents seront red\u00e9ploy\u00e9s depuis d’autres services. Une cohorte de contr\u00f4leurs des poids et mesures et plusieurs inspecteurs des imp\u00f4ts seraient, para\u00eet-il, d\u00e9j\u00e0 sur les rangs, ainsi qu’un ancien directeur du FMI. Affaire \u00e0 suivre.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Un article satirique du magazine capital.fr<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":3578,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[55],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-3576","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-societe","8":"entry"},"yoast_head":"\nLa brigade de r\u00e9pression des mannequins trop maigres - Ozinzen<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"L'Assembl\u00e9e nationale a vot\u00e9 l'interdiction de d\u00e9filer pour tous les mannequins trop maigres.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/ozinzen.com\/blog\/la-brigade-de-repression-des-mannequins-trop-maigres\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"fr_FR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"La brigade de r\u00e9pression des mannequins trop maigres - 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